巴黎之约 写给15年前的自己

本期旅行特辑,ELLE邀请作家绿妖、雕塑家向京等几位喜欢写字的朋友,在旅行路上给自己或朋友,写一封信。
很久没写信,提笔已觉流年似水。穿越时空的感觉,很迷人。
Hi,2002年的晓雪:
现在是2017年。15年前,你大概想不到15年后——我还在这里。每天在铁塔、卢浮宫、新桥、大小皇宫之间穿梭,一场一场地赶秀。在巴黎每个熟悉的地方,都会想起你,那个梳着马尾辫、第一次到巴黎、揣着地图和地铁线路图,兴奋得不知所措的你。
2012年,我写了一篇叫《十年》的文章,记录来巴黎的第一次到第十年,那篇故事现在还在网络上泪光闪闪地飞着,转眼又一个5年过去了。
这个月在巴黎停留一周,为了2017秋冬时装秀。一半时间在下雨、湿漉漉的有一点忧郁的巴黎,美如当年。当年你喜欢的那家书店,依然在拉丁区那个拐角,那几本买不起又厚重得抱不动的大画册,和灰尘一起躺在书店一隅。每次路过,找到那几本,抖一抖灰,翻开来,都是旧相识。
这次时装周的最后一场大秀,是路易威登,秀场在卢浮宫中庭。就是那个从贝聿铭设计的玻璃金字塔下去、穿过售票处,满是罗马雕塑的马利中庭。
我忍不住想起了你,那年你第一次进卢浮宫,穿一件橘红色小袄,走到这里时像小孩子一样满眼放光,啧啧惊叹,你说你正走进一个传说⋯⋯时光也许是复刻机,15年后,我已经数不清来过这里多少次,还是觉得——像走进了一个古老的传说,往事如昨。
秀结束,随着熙熙攘攘的人群走出金字塔,广场上的路灯亮了,夜色里被映照得金灿灿的卢浮宫华美而神秘。我走过马约尔的雕塑《地中海》,脑子里闪过你羞涩地笑着和这个雕塑合影的瞬间。
看秀这件事,从你那么痴迷,到我不那么痴迷,我们都还在这里。激情很重要,坚持比激情更重要。水滴石穿的故事,人们常提及石头竟被几滴水滴穿的结果,而其实令人尊敬的是那个趋于平淡而十分漫长的过程。
我没有保持住你那时的清秀,容颜正在不可逆转地衰老。我只留存了你对巴黎的一往情深。你常坐在街角咖啡厅目不转睛地看着街上的法国姐姐们喃喃:巴黎女人真好看啊,尤其是不再年轻的女人,那么有味道,岁月像一道光环罩在她们身上⋯⋯但愿,现在的我,已经活成了当年你眼中期待的模样。
在巴黎,塞纳河上一共有37座桥,你我都最爱杉木木板拼成的、踩上去嘎嘎响的艺术桥。我每次走上桥,都有时空穿梭的幻觉,仿佛看到你甩着马尾辫跳过来,记忆扑面,那大概就是初心的样子。
青春一晌,浮名落地。过去和现在缥缈交织,铁塔还是铁塔,卢浮还是卢浮;任世事变迁、疏钟淡月——你还是你,我也还是你。此处借用你彼时深爱而我至今依然深爱的木心先生笔下的佳句:岁月不饶人,我亦未曾饶过岁月。
在你我之间,岁月是一座桥,我们在两端,相安,思念。
2017年3月10日 于巴黎
编辑总监:晓雪
详情见《ELLE世界时装之苑》5月刊
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